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LOCAL LINKS OF INTEREST
Other sites of interest: |
"Varmer" Bob "One for the Road" I don't mind if I do "ta" A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and how about one for the road." G.King circa 2003
Keith the ex Baker Sug (Shoog)
Kevin
Dave Ron (Mr Guinness)
Bill the Post (little boy blue)
Peter's Sunday Lunch Yours Truly It is with great sadness that we have to announce that Jack passed away on Tuesday the 20th (on his 91st Birthday). He was a great character and will sadly be missed by club members.
JACK We’ve lost old Jack He won’t be back The Lord has called his number Perhaps there was a leak “upstairs” And He was looking for a plumber.
We’ll miss his tales of days gone by Of experiences in the war And though they were exciting We’d heard them all before How he’d been shot at by the Bosch Gosh that was a near number Especially as our old Jack Was just an English plumber.
So best of luck Jack Pembroke And go and fix God’s plumbing It must be getting damp up there, So He’ll be pleased to know you’re coming
It’s nice to know you’re wanted Even when you’re dead Just one word of warning tho’ Don’t pinch the Almightys' lead
The date is February 14th 2006 and Jack bought Sylvia a rose and a balloon Ahhhhhh !!!!!!
Big Jack he is a gamblin' man (he used to be a plumber), With lots of work in winter and 'sod all' in the summer, Our tale begins as Lucky Jack is on his way to ' Oz' He's fed up with the UK and he's going there because, The Tories here get up his nose so he's off out there because he knows, he cannot get the PM hung or Tebbitt on his bike.
So he's going out to Aussieland to organise a strike Maggy Thatch' is out of reach because she's had the sack, "she should be drawn and quartered" was the cry of Lucky Jack.
His hatred for authority was known both far and wide,"The cabinet is full of crooks and should be put inside." He put them straight "Down Under", so they knew where he was from, he showed in no uncertain terms , he was no whinging Pom He taught them crib and snooker (at which he was a crack) his prowess with the cue and ball bought fame for Lucky Jack
His treatment of the snooker balls (he hits them like a rocket) the system is to bash 'em hard and visit every pocket He taught them all he knew down there and left 'em wanting more, but felt he had neglected us so made for Blighties shore. "Welcome Home to Lucky Jack" was blazoned on the banner , it also showed his coat of arms Crossed Ballcocks on a Spanner.
His entrance to the betting shop is met with apprehension collecting pen and betting slip he magnifies the tension, His anguished claim "The nags I choose all finish at the back" But the bookie, he knows better that jammy Lucky Jack. And if you ask about his luck and does it make him glad? He'll say in no uncertain terms You must be B*****y mad.
He's red hot on the fruit machines and often takes the "Pot" but when asked how much he's won? he answers "Not a Lot" So whence the name of Jackpot comes is not difficult to crack it comes from our old plumbing mate whose known as LUCKY JACK
Lucky Jack is older now, he's greyer but he's wiser, His get up and go: got up and went, so he's not an early riser His plumbing days are over too, his ball cock's laid to rest, His spanners lying in the shed wrapped in an oily vest. They say old soldiers never die and plumbers are the same, But here's a well known character and all will know his name, You'll know him by his Anzac hat as often he is seen,
Chatting up old lady friends down by the village green. He's still around, enjoying life, despite the tales he tells, how the ruling class can kiss his ****, how he'd hang them by the bells. But though he's knocking on in years he likes a game of cards. For nothing pleases L. J. more, than winning from his pards He likes his game of crib you see, and though he says he's poor if you can manage 17 he'll come up with twenty four. Many have tried: many have failed to beat him at his game but they always find the end result is more or less the same. His fortune always favours him and he will never crack, so that is why he has the name: they call him
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